Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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