I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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