Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
