i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
it's like heaven, but drunker
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Come share oat with me in your robe
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize