I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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