idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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