i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
