I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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