You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
