capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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