apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
