What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
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