I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
