is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
