boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
