Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
