Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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