what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
