how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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