Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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