remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
