When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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