the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
