It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
