The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
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