Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
