I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize