i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
