Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
