Someone shit on the floor
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Randomize
