Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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