is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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