all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
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