I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
