Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
It's never too late to be topless.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
