So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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