If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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