First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
well you can't waste a boner
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
