summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
