remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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