im drinking this country out of the recession.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
