Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
