I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Randomize
