I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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