No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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