its not stalking. its research.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
