xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
