Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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