I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
