Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
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